For Writers: How to Answer the Worst Question

If you are a writer, and other living people actually know that you write, then you 100% have come across the monstrosity of a question. The big one. “What is your story about?” And that’s a really scary question, because as much as you would want to explain the world building and the lore and the character construct, you really can’t do that at a casual work party interaction.

I’ve flubbed this question a few dozen times. And that’s made me socially anxious enough to figure out how to answer as quickly and simply as I possibly can. What I realized is that when people ask you that question, they’re really only asking for your premise. If you’re familiar with three act structure language, this is your “first plot point” or “break into two”. If you’re not familiar with that terminology, you’re totally fine! All people want to know is ‘which character goes on what journey’.

So, you can use that formula: “My book is about this character that goes on this journey.” Try to get it is simple as possible and I highly, highly, highly recommend that every story that you might have the smallest sliver of a chance telling someone about… practice rattling that sentence off.

Here are some examples of what that formula might sound like:
“My book is about an orphan who goes to a magic wizardry school.”
“My story is about a paleontologist who gets invited to a theme park with real live dinosaurs in it.”
“My book is about a hobbit who has to destroy an evil ring.”
“My movie is about an ogre who is sent to rescue a princess.”

That’s it! People just want to know the character journey. You do not have to drop in like other plot points or back story or side characters.

Now, if you are professionally pitching your story idea to an agent or an editor or something, I would actually do two sentences. First sentence: plot point one. Second sentence: midpoint. So, start with the character goes on the journey and then add a twist. “My book is about this character that goes on this journey. But this twist changes everything.”

So a two sentence pitch would sound something like this:
“My book is about an orphan who goes to a magic wizardry school. But once there discovers that a dark lord is trying to infiltrate it.”
“My story is about a paleontologist who gets invited to a theme park with real live dinosaurs. But all the dinosaurs escape their enclosures.”
“My movie is about an ogre who is sent to rescue a princess. But falls in love with the princess instead.”

Another way that you can very quickly pitch your story is to use comps (comparable stories). When I first started writing I SO frightened of comps. I would be telling someone my story idea and they’d be like, “Oh, that’s like this other book I read” and I would be MORTIFIED because I wanted to be completely original. But the more I’ve learned about the craft and the marketing behind it, comps are amazing! Fully embrace your comps. Especially in situations where you need to just casually say what your book is about.

The best way to use comps is this formula: “It’s like this thing you already know but it has this twist.” That is the most marketable way you can casually tell somebody about your book. In fact, that’s what people in the industry actually look for! Because it’s the fastest way to give someone a full idea of what your story is about.

Here are some examples of this comp formula:
“It’s like Battle Royale only the contestants compete by playing children’s games.”
“It’s The Three Little Pigs but from the Big Bad Wolf’s perspective.”
“It’s Pride and Prejudice but now they have zombies” (bonus points if your title is literally your comp pitch haha)

Generally, I wouldn’t worry about it. In most social circles, they just want to know the bare minimum premise / character’s journey. Honestly you don’t even to share anything about your writing if you’re not comfortable. People ask because they’re making small talk and are usually satisfied with a genre-only answer. (“I’m writing a sci-fi.”)

I hope this helps! Let me know if there are any other writing topics you want me to ramble about.

The Time I Explained the Facts of Life to a Grown Woman

Alright, so if you didn’t already know I served an LDS mission in Peru for eighteen months. That’s where this *delightful* story takes place.

This one day the girl I lived with and I started talking about our future babies… as one does when you’re single and not at all in a position to have any. We were just kind of talking about our predictions and everything and what we thought pregnancy would be like (which, oh HELLO. Writing this at 34 weeks. Pregnancy is only the craziest thing I could never imagine)

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Anyways, we were talking about all that when this girl says, “I wonder how you get pregnant”.
Yo.

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Pffftlol. Whaaaaat? I was like, “Oh uh… do you really not know how people get pregnant?”
“No.”

Mind was blown out my butt. How could this grown twenty-something woman not know this? Like how could she have been so failed by the school system, her parents AND every single form of mainstream media ever?

So in my mind, I was like alright look. I obviously have no problem talking about this kind of thing. And she straight up asked me. And wouldn’t it be better for me to give her a solid educational response rather than hearing some raunchy joke and being really confused as a freaking ADULT?

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So in my crappy half Spanish… I explained the birds and the bees to her. Literally. I used “the birds” and “the bees”. Because I couldn’t really think of a better way to go about it? Like IDK folks, birds have eggs and bees pollinate, okay!

It was honestly probably a ten-minute spiel. Eight at best. And then after all that, she just gives me the blankest look and says, “No. I meant like I wonder how you time things so you get pregnant. Like how do you track when you’re ready to ovulate and everything?”

Ohhhhhhhhh kay.

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I don’t know why TF she let me just teach her grown a$$ about sex for ten minutes. Like I WENT THROUGH THE ENTIRE THING. I explained it ALL. She told me that once I started she didn’t stop me because she was curious about how I was going to explain it.

Face. Palm.

Knowing her, she probably didn’t stop me because she thought it was freaking funny to watch me embarrass myself thinking I was doing some self-decided good deed.

I should’ve just said, “I’ll tell you when you’re older.”