Author: valmanwill

Valerie Manwill writes coming of age novels and stories with quirky twists. She is an award-winning playwright and has a handful of stories published in varying anthologies. Other braggadocio includes being fluent in both Spanish and Golden Era Vines. Valerie melts in the Arizona sun with her two baby boys and snarky husband.

4 Things I Did for My Post Partum Body

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I think I felt less sexy in my post partum body then when I was pregnant. Seeing that weird little pooch hanging down there… I felt like I was still pregnant only now with a deflated basketball.

Here are four different things that I did, that seemed to help A LOT that year after I gave birth.

 

#1: I bought a new bra!

Guys. Really.

Looking at pictures of myself and my new body… all I could see was an orangutan.

boobie orang

And I honestly thought that it was because I was fat. But you know what? One day I tried on a new bra at the store and ba-bye orangutan shape. No kidding. I went from slouchy beanbag to curvy and feminine in one second. Pregnancy, breastfeeding, all of it! It changes your girls. And when you give them a new support, you give them new life. It works! I’m serious!

#2: I started taking my baby on walks.

I knew I had to get active. But how? Now you have a tiny little person that you can’t tote to the gym. And plus I hate working out, so there’s that. I secretly tried to learn the dance from the “Hideaway” music video… and threw out my back. (Not actually a joke) So after that point I was like… I have a stroller, let’s stroll.

I LOVED IT! And so did Jack! It was so nice to get out and about. Super non-intensive. And every walk was a little adventure!

#3: I gave up soda.

This one hurt.

coke

I am the queen of soda. I have a serious Mormon drinking problem. But I knew that if I actually wanted to lose any baby weight I had to trade in my sugary crutch. After I gave up soda, I lost 10 lbs in two months. So it’s always good to re-examine what small things are holding you back and decide what you can try to give up.

#4: I gave it time.

This is the answer you don’t want to hear, but it really is true. Getting back to your old body takes time. You grew a human inside of you! You’re amazing! Don’t tell yourself that you’re not amazing just because your body is normalizing after giving someone life! Give yourself time. It will happen.

Val’s Version of Stroganoff

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This used to be my husband’s favorite meal that I make and when we were first married he would have me make it every other day.

 

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INGREDIENTS:

1 lb hamburger

2 brown gravy mix packets

1 cup beef broth

1 Tb Worchestershire sauce

1/2 cup sour cream

 

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DIRECTIONS:

Brown the beef in skillet (drain excess fat). Add both gravy packets to the cooked meat. Add the beef broth and the Worchestershire sauce. Simmer until thick. Mix in the sour cream. Serve over noodles.

My Actually Haunted Ghost Story

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Ever since I started writing this horror short story, strange things have been happening to me.

 

The very first night that I even began outlining… something really creepy happened. A sound came over my baby monitor. A high-pitched trill that sounded like someone screaming. Dan and I just stared at each other like… whaaaaaaaaat is that?? It had never done anything like that before or anything since… I didn’t tell Dan that I was working on a ghost story at the time and tried to pretend like it wasn’t the creepiest thing ever.

After the baby monitor thing, I tried to listen to music when I worked on the story. But the music would inexplicably turn itself on and off.

Then, one night I had a vivid nightmare that I was lying on the floor of my apartment and couldn’t get up. This weirdly-lit guy was standing by the wall, grinning at me. He slowly came closer and closer to my face. I woke up gasping and thrashing my arms trying to push him away. Dan calmed me down. The next day the light had burnt out in the spot the man had “stood” in my nightmare.

creepy lighting

After I had written the story and revised it. I was cleaning a bottle for my son at the kitchen sink when I saw a man in a blue jacket walk across my backyard. Thinking it was my husband I dashed to the other window to wave hi… no one was there. And I know, because I frantically checked ALL of my windows and EVERY inch of my backyard.

I finally finished revising the darn story. Good. I exited completely out of Word. And I started to play around on the internet… when the thing RE-OPENED ITSELF onto my computer. I think I wrote a ghost story that in and of itself became haunted.

5prtl

So… anyone want to read it?

Ava, a true skeptic, has no problem cleaning and closing The Redd’s Theater by herself at night… even though it is said to be haunted by a magician who murdered his wife there. 5,000 words

If you are brave enough to challenge the haunted ghost story, you can fill out the application below and I will email it to you. (All I ask in return is that you tell me what you thought of it.) HAPPY HALLOWEEN!