My Unsolicited Advice

(I literally just sat down and typed up all of the general advice I give people when they ask… you didn’t ask… but here you go anyway hahaha)


If you are considering starting a family with someone, imagine what it would be like to raise that particular person as a child. Because you will be if you have a family with them. All the weaknesses and quirks they have will be present in miniature form. Is that something you can handle?


If you’re test piloting a new relationship or friendship you can get a snapshot of the person’s recreational style by taking them on a hike.
There are two types of people on a hike…

Person A: “Let’s go all the way to the top.” “C’mon, don’t slow down! Let’s see how fast we can do it!” “Let’s hang glide off the top and then go jet skiing after this.”
Person B: “Wow, a creek! Let’s stop here and talk about life for an hour. Take a picture of me by this cool tree. Let’s follow this butterfly!”

Likely you found one of these hikes more fun than the other. The way someone hikes so often reflects their vacation style (packed itinerary vs relaxing) and just how they like to have fun in general. I’m not saying you wouldn’t be compatible with said person, because A and B people can help balance each other out. But I AM saying that this conflict will come up. And it’s just good to have a heads up on that and also test how flexible the other person is to the things you like to do.


My top parenting advice is to watch Daniel Tiger together with your child. Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood is written with extensive input from early learning specialists and it models the authoritative parenting approach extremely well. The little songs are short and easy to use in the moment. I just find Daniel Tiger super informative and helpful for both the parent and child.


The other parenting advice (information) I have, is that you will be parenting yourself as you parent your children. Your children are not half as hard as parenting yourself so be an extra kind parent. Give yourself kind words when things are tough. Don’t force yourself to live up to anyone else’s expectations, let you be you! Take an interest in yourself and what you like and allow yourself to explore that. You know, all good kind parent stuff.


Here’s something, a secret more than advice. Your thirties are going to be way better than your twenties. Yes, you’re skinnier in your twenties. Yes, you have more freedom to play around. But your thirties is when you finally step in to yourself. You’re smarter and generally more capable. Thirties are really really great. Don’t let the anti-aging cosmetic marketing team fool you.


And finally, meet yourself where you are. Whatever that means for you. Little by little DOES make a HUGE difference. If you can’t do it all do the smallest part of it. Wash one pot. Clip your fingernail. Write one email. Have some takeout today. Good job! You did something, anything. And that’s all you need. The smallest steps have saved my butt.

The Card Shuffle

I had a really weird experience the other day and decided to write about it. It might seem small or dumb, but bear with me here!

I was playing Uno with my kids, which requires a healthy amount of card shuffling between each game. … Now, I’ve never been able to shuffle. Since I was a kid, I would just kind of mix up the cards. Spread ‘em around on the ground. Or just give them to someone else! But something weird happened in my brain when I was playing with my kids. I thought

I’m going to try to shuffle these cards.

And I did it perfectly without hesitation. Shhhhhhffffft. I could even do the bridge. Fwwffffftttt.

That blew my mind. Because here I was, a woman on the cusp of thirty-one years old. And all my life I had been actively TELLING MYSELF that I did not know how to shuffle cards. I had NEVER TRIED TO SHUFFLE A DECK OF CARDS. I was just telling myself not to do it and that I didn’t know how. But I never once split a deck and actually tried to do it.

I cannot tell you how freaky this experience was for me. It was like The Truman Show. My whole reality is in question now. What else have I been telling myself I can’t do??? What else have I been telling myself I don’t enjoy? What else have I been telling myself “that’s bad”.

So that’s it. Deconstruct your Truman Show set! You can do whatever you want! You can like whatever you want! You can be you! That is all! I love you

Are You Ugly?

Credit: Norman Rockwell,

You are a very attractive person. There… What? You still don’t believe me? Keep reading. I’ll prove it.

I was driving to Salt Lake and that Chainsmokers song came on for the eightieth time that day. I thought to myself, “Wow, one of those guys has kind of a sexy voice.” You know, that deep one that kicks off the first chorus of “Closer”. The more I listened the more I wondered what they looked like. I began to construct a caricature in my mind and as soon as I hit a Wi-Fi spot I ran a Google Image search on my phone. They were better looking than the picture I had in my head.


But something weird happened… I was really disappointed. I don’t know what I was expecting. I guess I was hoping that The Chainsmokers would be a little uglier… or dressed a lot worse… or something. Anything that would make their “sexy voices” a novelty or a hidden treasure. I didn’t want a fresh-of-the-conveyor-belt billboard kind of dude. My reaction to this experience got me delving into the concept of “beauty”.

Have you ever loved a movie that your best friend hated? Or looked at a piece of high-concept art that you didn’t get at all? That’s because art / beauty is completely subjective.

SUBJECTIVE: (adj) existing in the mind; belonging to the thinking subject rather than to the object of thought.

For example… My favorite article of clothing is a Men’s XL flannel shirt that I got from a thrift store for $5. I adore it. I wear it AT LEAST once a week. I understand that it’s not every girl’s dream to own a floppy man shirt, but it was exactly what I was looking for. Sometimes when I slip it on I think, “At some point, someone didn’t want you”. Maybe it wasn’t their style or maybe it didn’t fit like it used to. For whatever reason it was donated to the thrift store where they decided that it was worth five dollars. But hey man. I would never give this thing up. When I wear it I feel confident and happy. It freaking completes me.

Maybe at some time in your life you were donated to a thrift store. Now you feel like you have a reduced price sticker dangling from your arm. But you know what? Just because it’s trendy to wear a frilly crop-top doesn’t mean EVERY SINGLE PERSON wants to own one. Your unique features, traits and interests are what makes you irreplaceable. When you get your heart broken you don’t ever sit around thinking “Man, I miss dat a$$.” No! You miss the way that person laughs or their taste in music. How are you ever going to find someone else as fun as them? Or someone else that can draw as well, or loves FanFiction X, or plays Jenga or WHATEVER. These are the things that people fall head over heels for and you already have it! I don’t care who you are, YOU HAVE IT! Don’t give away your quirks, because that’s how you’re going to find the right partner. Don’t give away what makes you YOU to become a boring one size fits all robot.


Last Sunday, I was at church and I had to sit out in the foyer because my toddler was trying to pinch people’s bums through the seats. Typical Sunday. A 90-year-old woman came over to talk to me. She complemented me on how well “I filled out my dress”. Which was surprising, because I was self-conscious that I had filled it out a little too well. She then mentioned that she always had to wear long sleeves because she was embarrassed of how old and frail her arms had gotten over the years. But gosh darn it, when I saw her shuffle slowly out the door on the arm of her equally elderly husband I started to cry. Because that woman is BEAUTIFUL. I can’t even begin to fathom the love that her husband feels for her. And you know what, maybe they were both drop dead hot when they were young! But they’ve outlived the world’s standard and redefined what it is to be attracted to someone.

People will spend all the energy and ignorance of their soul trying to convince you that you should look a certain way. And that’s only because at some point in their lives they gave into the primitive fear of social rejection. Don’t let them fool you. Your worth is not defined by a number or a symmetrical formula. It’s defined by how you live your life. So live. Dream your dreams. You are a beautiful person. I promise.



Everyone likes to do different things to feel beautiful. And you know what? That’s totally 100% real and okay! You do you boo! I’m a theater bred girl so my love of make-up is strong, HOLLA! If you have a special occasion that you want to get dolled up for- Katie is your gal. She’s a freelance make-up artist who is all about highlighting your natural beauty. Psst. Here’s her page…